"When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things." (I Corinthians 13:11)
Today we spent my 31st birthday at Lagoon. As my parents, sister, and best friend sang happy birthday to me over our picnic in the terrace, I laughed at being 31 and holding my birthday party at Lagoon. I laugh at the idea that I still don't feel grown up despite the fact that I live in my own apartment, I have a grown up job, I own my own car (and scooter), I have a cosmetology license and almost a bachelor's degree, and because some of my own friends and family very near to my age are already the parents of 3 children. And I also laugh realizing that I am happy that I am still young in the ways that allow me to find joy in silly things.
As I thought about my final reason for loving 30, I have thought about the fact that 30 is a great age to be. And the reason that 30 is so great is that I finally know myself. I am comfortable in my own skin. I know that I hate river rafting and scary movies, and that's okay. I know that I love roller coasters, I love Lake Powell, I love wake boarding, and I love living in an apartment with no TV. At 30, I have grown enough in my career to provide an income that allows me to do things I've always wanted to do, and allows me to learn from holding a position of responsibility. And, I've also learned enough about love to know that I can love many people in many different ways, and sometimes that means my heart breaks. It's okay that I won't marry every man that I fall in love with, and the only way I can truly settle is to not trust that the Lord will provide me the opportunities that will bring me the most joy.
Most importantly, at 30 - and as of today, 31 - I have recognized that I am a woman, and I have put away childish things. My life, though silly and unrefined, is focused (as much as I know how to focus) on knowing who I want to become and striving to reach that potential. It is a process every day, and some days are better than others. But God has given me the opportunity to enjoy every step of my journey. I don't have to give up going to amusement parks, jumping in puddles, eating cookie dough, and having a slumber party every once in awhile just because I am grown up. I just have to keep remembering to live up to who I am so I can bring real joy into my journey, and to others.
3 comments:
Happy Be-lated birthday!!! I am so jealous that you spent it at Lagoon. Wow, Magic Mtn and Lagoon all in a week. You are living a dream life, girl! It sounds like your day was great. I love this post! It reminds me to do the same with my life! Love you!
Being grown up is a little overrated. I'm glad you've got a good perspective on the situation. Have we had enough roller coasters for one year?
Rachel, I just turned 30 last month, and a few weeks ago we took the 3 older boys to Lagoon to celebrate the twins' birthday. I have never enjoyed the place so much before! I loved it all! And now we are talking about going to Disneyland in a few years...
Things have changed since I was a teenager, and I can no longer ride the Colossus without getting sick, but WICKED was absolutely awesome! Happy 31 to you! Glad you had a great birthday party!!!
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