I have been wishing and hoping every day that today would be the day. I'm uncomfortable, exhausted, and just all around ready for you to be in my arms instead of my belly! But more than the physical burdens, this last week has brought the emotional turmoil of pregnancy more than ever before. See, we've spent the last 9 months together, and I can't imagine the pain of taking this journey and not being able to share life with you at the end of it. There is no reason to worry. You are healthy and you are ready. And yet...
I've heard the stories and I can't help but count the kicks each day, and feel the guilt when I haven't eaten enough protein and veggies. I'm just so nervous that we've come this far and something will go wrong right at the end. But I know I can't spend all my time worrying about the what-ifs. What is meant to be will be, and I'm doing my best to make sure you have every chance of being healthy and strong. Your dad and I have been going to birthing classes and I'm excited to go through the process of birth together, but nervous I won't be capable of seeing it through the way I want to do it. However, as long as you get here safe and sound, I'll take you any way you come!
Today it occurred to me that while you could potentially decide tomorrow's a good day to introduce yourself to the world, more than likely you will wait until you're due, and despite my discomfort there are better ways to live with that than feel sorry for myself. I'm always happier when I take action and make the most of the time I have. Your dad and I took a Sunday morning stroll at the Port Orleans resort that lifted my spirits and allowed me a chance to rethink how the next 3 weeks should go. It was lovely to enjoy the morning sun, lay in a hammock along the walking trail, and take in the view as we walked along the riverfront. We only have a few more weeks when it will be just the two of us, and I decided we need to enjoy that time, even if I am exhausted.
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| The view at Port Orleans |
So... here are some ways I've decided I'll use the time I have left (aside from work since that will still be happening as well):
1. Swimming - I've been in Florida far too many months to have spent so little time in a swimming pool!
2. Going on dates with your daddy - We might not be able to do much of that for awhile when you first come along, so we should probably take advantage now.
3. One more trip to Disney? - We'll have to see about this. It doesn't have to be a long one, but we might as well get in a few hours since we can, right?
4. General Conference - It's happening next weekend, and it will be the last time I can sit through the whole thing without multi-tasking. I should make the most of that...
5. Cleaning - I actually do enjoy this, and I'd love to come home to a perfectly clean house when we leave the hospital.
6. Exercising - Walking has been a little rough, but I can get creative. I think this is where swimming might come in handy for more than just fun.
7. Reading - what better time to sit back, forget the rest of the world and enjoy a good book than when you're waiting for something? There are a few good ones on my list I'm ready to pick up.
8. Serving - it's far easier to forget myself when I have others to take care of. I know that I need to step outside of my pain and help others ease theirs. That is truly when I'm happiest.
There. How can I not have a good three weeks if I've got all these lovely things to look forward to? However, should you feel the need to push the date up... I promise I won't complain. :)
Love,
Mom
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